The most embarrasing moment of my life happened when I was in the ninth grade. We were all in health class and everyone was just sitting around quietly or sitting with their head down on the desk, because it was the end of the year and we were all relaxing.

Everything was quiet when I bent over because I had dropped the pencil I was doodling with. I didn't even feel it coming... the loudest boom wave ever heard. My nightmare: I farted in my classroom in front of everyone.

All of a sudden everyone was looking in my direction. They still didn't know exactly where it came from, and I was hoping they wouldn't ever find out. I had to think quick, so I blamed it on the girl next to me. Everyone believed me, until the moment when I thought I would die.

First I was laughing with everyone else. But as soon as I did, an even louder fart came out and again I didn't even feel it coming. And all of a sudden I felt a pain... it was diarrhea.

Luckily no one heard that one with all the laughing going on, but I got up to go to the trashcan and everyone started laughing at me. When I had farted not just gas had come out, and now it was all over the back of my white shorts.

"A big doodoo spot!" this boy kept shouting out, pointing at me. This boy just kept saying "Ooh, gross! She has shit on the back of her shorts!"

Boy was I glad it was the end of the year. I guess God punished me for lying on the girl next to me.